The Saga of the Burgled Minivan Continues...

On March 16, the Sexy Minivan was burgled. I called the insurance company and they began working on my claim. I explained to them that the car was not damaged, in any way, and that the console in the back had been removed so cleanly, that it was apparent the thieves knew just what they were doing.

Then Mr. Mac and I promptly went out of town for a few days.

Upon my return, I took the Sexy Minivan to my insurance company's claim center. They instructed me to do this, so that they could complete the repairs and I would be on my way. At that time, they inspected the car, and they said yeah... we'll get it fixed.

About two hours later, I get a call from my buddy John at the insurance company. He tells me that they can't fix the minivan. The part they need is something that they don't keep in stock, and I have to take the minivan to a dealer.

But I can't do that until they give me permission. Because - GET THIS - they have to pass this claim through their fraud and investigations unit. See, because of the type of damage (none) and the value of the item removed (high), they think it's possible that I (or maybe a teenager in my home?) may have taken it out myself and hocked it on the street. First, there are no teenagers in my home. Second... I hate to be rude about it, but that's an awful lot of work for a net benefit to me of what would likely be a few hundred, if that much. Seriously, I doubt I could get the cost of my deductible out of this thing on the street!

I pass that investigation with no problem, and this morning I took the Sexy Minivan to the dealer. They look at what needs to be done, and say "Wait... let's check and make sure we have that part in stock." I say that they should, since I called in the repair a few days ago and the person with whom I spoke said they would have it ready for a Friday install. Oh, he says.... they didn't place the order. Seems the guy I spoke to forgot to finish the order in their system.

So now, I have yet another weekend without my DVD player. Granted, I have a husband this weekend, and we're not traveling, so it's not like I *need* the thing. But, at this rate, I've got three weeks invested in getting the thing fixed. And untold numbers of visits to the dealer and service center and beyond.

What a pain in the ass. I swear.

23,514 Minutes....

I'm singing the "525,600 Minutes" song in my head. See, I've started a countdown. I know how many days, hours... minutes.... I have left here.

It puts it all in perspective.

In case you didn't pick up already, I have the most abominable job. I work for a division that is largely blue collar, and its belief is that all staff, non-exempt or otherwise, should be treated like an hourly worker. My former boss, the evil harridan from hell, used to ensure that we all faced the same exact rules, whether we are a senior-level staff person or the mail room clerk. I was expected to arrive early and stay late as needed, but if ever I had to arrive late or leave early, I had to supply a plan for how I would "make up" the time, or else submit a written request for time off.

The funniest was when my boss didn't want to approve time off for a doctor's appointment, stating that we were too busy to justify anyone out of the office.

In addition, the people who work in my company, in general, and even in my department, are what we'd call "less than professional" in both their demeanors and backgrounds. I would say that even the salary-level employees of this company trend toward the non-college-educated. Not that such is a problem, but the demeanor, and dress, and (snobbily she says) intellect level is. There are many here who just don't get it. At all. And some of them have jobs where they *should* get it.

At the end of the day, my situation has been, at best, that of a square peg trying to wiggle into the round hole. I've adapted. I'm smart enough to figure out that I needed to make this work until I had my feet on the ground in this city, and I established a network to help me find a job.

But, that never happened. I never gelled here, and it just didn't work. So now I begin my countdown until I leave.

23,514 minutes doesn't actually leave a lot of time. I have a lot to finish. I better get cracking!

Homes to call our owns....

The sellers on our intended house accepted our offer, with very little haggling. This is just awesome! My mom has looked at the pictures, and she thinks this house is "going to be really good for a few years".

Mr. Mac has all but decided to go to Emory, which means he will stay at home with me and Miss Baby. I cannot tell you how excited I am about this! YAY! See, I like him, which is a large part of why I married him. If he was going to be gone all week, only to return home for the weekends, I would be sad. But he's not. He's going to the smartypantses lawyer college that is right down the road from our house! And it's a top-25 school! AND they have a fabulous law & technology program that is co-sponsored by Ga. Tech, which Mr. Mac thinks is way cool! Yay! Yippee Yay!!!

Funny side note.... Right now, my family owns 6 houses. That's one house per adult. If any of the menfolk misbehaves, the threat of banishing him to the shed out back is, well, empty, since each could each go to one of the 'other' houses we own. Nothing like trying to move both daughters (and empty out a beach house that's going to be demolished and rebuilt) in one summer for my 60+ parents, now is there?

NCAA Tournament Cancelled?

I hate it when they have to go and do that. Man.

Home again, home again. Jiggety-jig.

The day AFTER the buglarizing of the Sexy Minivan, Mr. Mac, Miss Baby and I all went on a ROADTRIP. A massive one in the case of Mr. Mac and me. Miss Baby was taken to the Farm and deposited in the loving arms of her Mama-nette and Papa-bill. Needless to say, there was not a whimper uttered when Mr. Mac and I headed out the door Saturday, bound for Atlanta and the REAL ESTATE EXTRAVAGANZA!!!!!

Y'all, there are a BUNCH of small, crappy houses inside the perimeter in Atlanta in my price range. There are NOT a lot of houses with "bearable" storage space and "adequate" room in my price range that are not in cracktown. There are NOT a lot of houses that have a finished out basement and a nice back yard. There certainly are NOT many with a master bedroom large enough for a king-size bed AND with TWO closets. There are NOT a lot of houses that are near a big ole park with two jungly-gyms and swingsets and a train/car play thing and a bike path, soccer fields and tennis courts.

However, there is ONE. Or at least there WAS one yesterday. I've instructed Elsie the Realtor to make an offer.

EEEEEEEEEK!

So, I'm about to lose possession of my home here in Hellorida. And gain possession of a new home in Hot-Lanta. It needs a little work (floor finishing, paint, a roof, and appliances), but not that much.

It has wall to wall hardwoods upstairs, and I'm tiling the downstairs. Holy cow this is amazing.

Now, this decision to purchase said home did not come lightly. I do NOT, repeat NOT, have a job. I do not know when I would need to be up there. I have a LOT of uncertain things hanging over my head. However, I know one thing - I will soon be calling DeKalb County home. I will soon be living 10 minutes from my sister, and 20 from my brother in law. Not much else, but AT LEAST I WILL HAVE A ROOF OVER MY HEAD!!!!

The conversations at my company's division went very well, and I am confident that I will have a job landed by the end of June, which is when I need it to be landed. They tried to coerce me into taking a position that's open now, and below my level (they being HR, which is normal for HR folks). But I said "Nope - to get me, you will have to woo me with riches and power and a tiara". Actually, the tiara part is literally true.

After all this gallyvanting around Atlanta this weekend, we headed out to Athens Monday night. Mr. Mac had gone to visit the lawyer college at Emory, which is very nice and also very, very, very expensive. However, he did like it a lot, and he felt that he could be happy there. I, of course, would be ecstatic because Mr. Mac woudl spend his 3 years of lawyer college at the HOME that we are trying to buy, and I would like that very, very much. So would Miss Baby who loves him dearly. Athens was, well, a lot the same. Even found Mr. Mac a place in my old apartment building. However his "application for admission has entered the committee review process. This process usually takes several weeks." Still. Damn.

BUT - Speaking of Miss Baby, after our trip over to Athens, we picked her up Tuesday afternoon. We stopped off at the farm and had an early dinner. Now, let's remember back to Saturday morning. Mommy and Daddy leave - Miss Baby giggles, runs around, and waves bye-bye. No tears. Nothing. Just "Seeya folks - don't let the door hitya on the way out!"

On Tuesday, Mama-nette has to leave to to to town. Miss Baby pitched a lay-in-the-floor-and-cry fit. We put her in the DVD-less but still Sexy Minivan to return, and she was okay. Until Papa-bill got out of the car and didn't take her with him. Again, inconsolable for a good 3 or 4 minutes.

So we know that she knows where *her* bread is buttered. And I guess that Daddy and I will do, in a pinch, if needed. But really, what she'd love for us to do is find a house too small, and leave her at home, on the farm.

But it's nice to have a home. Even if it's long-term getting there. Home is good.

My minivan got burgled!

Seriously, y'all. The SEXY MINIVAN was BURGLED! What did they take? Oh, just the console from the back, which includes the LIGHTS and the rear "climate control", and MOST IMPORTANTLY.... the DVD screens.

And they took Miss Baby's Baby Einstein DVDs.

What kind of asshole steals from a BABY? At least they didn't take her seat. Or, the cellphone in the front. Or the CHANGE sitting in the "change receptor" in front.

AAAAAAAAAGH! I'm so pissed! OMIGOD!

Bah. Back to brackets being ruined. Thanks Ooooooooooooooooklahoma!

(yes, I've had a nip o' the whiskey tonight)

Ooooops!

There went my Sweet 16. Thanks Oklahoma. I guess Sooner was the end to their run....

Bracketology

It's all the rage. Picking the brackets. Trying to figure out who will win. The way I do it is I sit down with a bracket, and I go with my gut on who will win what games. So that ended me up with a final three others of Nevada, Kansas and UNC. What, you think my gut EVER goes against Duke?

The problem with my method is best expressed in the above group of teams. Don't get me wrong - I think UNC is a darn good team, and that Roy is a great coach, and I think they will ultimately scare the be-jesus out of a top team. But, I don't think they have the stamina and maturity it takes to get to the Final Four. I know nothing about Kansas except that their coach is Bill Self. Nevada - I just know they're "hot" and that they play at high altitudes which makes them a tough matchup for Boston College.

BC would have been a "gut" pick but for the Nevada factor.

In all, I'm actually happy with Duke's bracket. I think that we were somewhat screwed by being given a strong 3 and 4 in our region. Texas as a #2 doesn't scare me - we beat them by 30, and it easily could have been 50 had we chosen to do so. That game will play heavily in their minds. Iowa is a VERY strong #3 in my view, and LSU is strong at the 4 spot. I still feel pretty good about our chances.

Where I think we did get a bit of a raw deal is in the possibility of playing UNC by the Sea. They will have a home court there in Greensboro between it being close to their home and the fact that the rest of the teams pull against the 1 seed. I think they have a good shot at taking down GW, who has played virtually nobody at all.

Lastly to address Gonzaga. I cannot believe that the committee didn't set up the JJ vs. Adam Morrison showdown in the regional by giving the 'Zags the 2 in our region. I don't really understand that at all. Frankly, I'm also shocked that Kentucky isn't our 8 seed either.

In all, our region is balanced. Top to bottom, it's tough - especially in the middle and lower seeds. But, I think it is one where Duke can win, as long as we play our game and well.

For the other regions, I'm still at a loss. I'm very reluctant to pick UConn - they haven't shown me that they have a will to win. UCLA stands a decent chance at taking the West, as does Memphis or Gonzaga, or for that matter Kansas. It's certainly tough. The East region is up in the air for me too. UConn is very likely to flame out. I just don't know which team will do it. Tennesee is such an unknown now. UNC will beat someone, I tell you. They're good - they work hard and they're well coached. I just don't think they quite have all the pieces to pull out a Final Four appearance. And the Midwest is a mystery.

At the end of the day, my ability to be an effective bracketologist is really hampered by my lack of knowledge of this year's teams. I haven't had the time or energy to sit and watch game after game. I've seen most of Duke's games, and a few other ACC matchups, and maybe one or two non-ACC games. Outside that, I haven't had the time, or the energy, or the interest.

Way to finish

Nice game today. Excellent.

And we have the MOST tourney wins of any program.

On to the next one. We're off to the park! It's 80+ degrees here!

Survive & Advance

About two weeks early for that, but damn. Anyway, I asked all the brand-new Miami fans (as of the end of the 1st half today brand new) what the Samba Band they had for the Wagon did now that the trip was over.

They didn't get it.

I'm so funny. I slay me. I'm glad I have a husband who laughs at my stupid jokes.

GO DUKE!

Bullies

I'm Southern. It's a central part of my being. I spend significant time and energy trying to ensure that I don't step on anyone's toes and don't hurt anyone's feelings. It's just my nature. That said, I'm not a wimp. "Steel Magnolia" is certainly an apt descriptor. I'm tough and firm when I need to be, but I try to stand up for myself with a sugar coating.

I also carefully observe the rules of etiquette and good manners. What I've found is that these rules translate into a very professional demeanor in the business world. People like to work with those who respect their time and space, and they appreciate when colleagues express thanks and appreciation as necessary. They also appreciate when less than positive news is given in a kind tone.

How does this relate to bullies? Well, to put it mildly, I'm having an issue with a colleague at work. See, she's not Southern - she's a Puerto Rican from Manhattan, and she is PROUD of that heritage. She flaunts it. By flaunt, I'm using Webster's definition that states "to display ostentatiously or impudently". Yeah. She's a bully, very honestly. A classic schoolyard bully. We'll just call her The Bully.

The Bully comes to all meetings late, whether she calls them or someone else - like 15 to 20 mintues (here in a culture where meetings begin on time). I find this to be a sign of complete disrespect for others. She has used tone and words with her subordinates that would make me just leave.

The Bully has even attempted to boss me about my work (to which I literally responded "Listen, you are not the boss of me. Now back off!").

Well, lately, I've had to deal with her subordinates and also the suppliers we use calling me to complain about the treatment she's giving them. In addition, I have heard through the grapevine that The Bully is having meetings with the vendors I manage on the side, and instructing them that she, in fact, is my boss. Or at least that she is responsible for the things that I do in my job. Behind my back. Pretty tacky, to say the least.

And I don't know what to do. One one hand, I think that I should just lay low and let it go - after all, I'm leaving in a few months so there's really nothing for me to gain by standing up except to make her mad. I've always just avoided bullies, because I learned early on that there was no winning a show-down with one.

But, there's the principle of it all. And the fact that she's acting with very bad manners is really a poor reflection on our entire group. Additionally, she's hurting the overall morale of our group here. Folks are going home crying - one woman went home in tears last night after The Bully kept here an hour and a half late, yelling at her and breaking her down. She did nothing wrong (only what I'd asked her to do), and she was so upset when she got home that she didn't eat dinner and went to bed. This woman is someone who is just so sweet and concientious - I've had to work with her just to calm down. And it's just one example.

I could go on with the examples of the behavior, but it's just too depressing. I've broached the subject with my boss (also The Bully's boss), and he thinks there are definitely some "communications issues". However, he still hasn't seemed to reign her in.

At the end of the day, I'm just hoping that she will get herself fired or quit in a snit. I don't want to deal with her. On the other hand, I'm trying my best to counter the destructive influence she's having on my colleagues and also on our business relationships. It's very frustrating in the least.

So how do you balance it - I hope there's a way to get through to her by example, rather than by confrontation. Unfortunately, as time goes on, I realize we will probably have to have some sort of a show-down. And trust me, The Bully will ensure it's a show-down rather than a discussion.

The Bully is out of the office today. It's so much quieter here, and more peaceful, and it's really less stressful all around. I think that I'll point this out to my boss. Maybe he'll start cluing into this and recognize he has to deal with it.

Mr. Mac Smartypantses

My husband has been accepted to the Emory University School of Law. Now if UGA will get off their arses and do the right thing here.

I find smartypantses men hott!

Manners and decency

We went to NC over the weekend. We took Miss Baby to see my mother in law, and also we decided to take in the Duke-UNC game. We should have sold our tickets. Yuck! What a stinker!

We went to my favorite undergrad hangout, Satisfaction, and enjoyed a wonderful pizza and cold beer. I *wish* I could find pizza that yummy elsewhere!

However, we went on to the game, to sit and enjoy. The game was GREAT for the first 5 minutes, and then everything proceeded to fall apart from that point forward. There was a UNC fan and her son behind us. I'd like to point out that they kept their mouths shut - I saw her grinning ear-to-ear after the buzzer, but never once did she taunt or say anything nasty.

I wish that could have been said for the team on the floor. What a bunch of jerks - especially Tyler Hansborough who went around grabbing his wee wee and thrusting his crotch at a stadium full of kids. Nice dude. Then there was the UNC fan who sat down in the chairs for the UNC bench after the game. I say chairs, because he took up four of them. And he sat there flinging his crotch in the air. What is it with these people and the pelvic thrusting???

So, it was bad. Made worse by us having to spend an hour sitting on US 64 trying to get from I-40 back to Cary, what should be a 5 mile journey.

However, what killed me was last night when we got onto the airplane. Delta, as is their practice, did not pre-board us again. I had almost-free tickets, so we took the damn trip with them. By the time we boarded, the jerks sitting in front of us had put all their luggage into our overhead bin, rather than gate-checking it. I asked if they would please do that, as we needed to keep our diaper bag close at-hand, and they said "No. We were here first." Not that they need it - just a nyanny-nyanny-boo-boo sort of response.

So we jammed the bags under the seat and decided we'd deal. About this time, I start hearing them bitch about having to sit by a baby. "It will probably cry and scream. I don't understand why parents always bring their kids on airplanes - they ought to have a rule to charge DOUBLE for the kids!" And they proceeded to carry on a bit. Then the people behind us started bitching.

Now, I want to pause here and make sure it's clear - Miss Baby has been on half a dozen plane trips covering 10 or so flights in her year on this earth. She has slept from take-off to landing on each of those, never uttering so much as a peep of discontent. She has been the model angel child on every single flight.

So, she must have heard the complaining, understood, and proceeded to show them what's what. Kharma's a total bitch sometimes. Piece of advice - if you're sitting in the bulkhead seat (already blessed with legroom), and you've taken a family's overhead bin space, perhaps it's best to suffer through keeping your chair upright when you're sitting in front of a couple with a one-year-old.

Or maybe just keep your bitching to yourself when she kicks your seat repeatedly and plays with the tray table over and over.

Because, you see, Miss Baby is intuitive, and she figured these people were not so very nice. So she took her revenge and screamed. And wiggled. And kicked seats. And did all the awful things a la Jeffery (from the Bill Cosby skit). She was AWFUL!

And I have to admit, as her mommy, I didn't try to curb her as much as I may would have, had the folks around us not been such obnoxious jerks to begin with. Don't get me wrong - Mr. Mac and I both tried our best to soothe her. We asked Delta for milk after Miss Baby drained her cup, but of course, they didn't have any. We put her in the aisle to play, since we had no room in front of us. Basically, we did what we could, but I have to admit, when she was in my lap, I let her have free reign with her feet. She kicked the hell out of the seat in front of us.

At the end of it all, though, it came back to the kid grabbing his wee wee on Cameron's floor after the game. And to the rather large dude taunting in the same way. It's all about decency and respect for the folks around you. We don't live alone in this world. We are required to share our space with others. It's only common decency to make sure that we take steps NOT to interfere with others.

I'm not saying the guys in front of us on the plane should have offered their seats (despite that being what I've done in the past for moms with a child in lap). However, perhaps they could have acted in such a manner as not to take up what little bit we had been granted. Maybe taken a little bit of sympathy for someone who's obviously got a little more on her hands.

I've become sick of folks giving lip about babies on airplanes in general. I have to admit, I've never been one of Those Travelers who complain about it to begin with. I've always felt more sympathy for the parents than anything - I always knew it couldn't be easy! Take our perspective - we fly to NC because it's a 10-hour drive (minimum) for us. We can't just hop in the car to go see Grandma for the weekend. Furthermore, we take at least one kid because, well, they're the only two grandkids that she has. She takes great joy out of seeing her grandgirls, and we try our best to get them there as much as possible. Flying is expensive, so we economize as much as possible, taking advantage of the airlines' generosity for allowing us to carry our small one in our lap.

It's really something, though, that folks feel like it's their right to complain about this kind of thing. And complain so loudly that the parent (or possibly even the kid) overhears.

Sometimes, though, the kid gets back at 'em. And I must say - I have to laugh when it comes back to bite the complainers in the arse.

GTHC! (II)

They're bastard born and
they're bastard bred and
when they die they'll be bastard dead!

Mr. Mac, Miss Baby and I are heading out to the Old North State in about 2 hours. We'll catch ya on the flip side. Remember, the reason the sky is that color is so we don't have to step in it.

I'm sure I'll cry at Shelden, Sean and JJ's last game. I'm sure there will be 'cue eaten. Even more exciting, tomorrow, I go see my baby new cousin.

Who am I?

My "Girls Weekend" was wonderful. I truly enjoyed spending time with my mom and sister, and also with other people from Home. It's amazing, coming from a small town, how powerful the "Home" connection really is.

Several wonderful things happened over this weekend. Truly awesome and incredible. First, and foremost, there was the conference we attended. As I had hoped, this was more about spirituality and less about politics. Beth delved into the notion of a generational identity, and how God "names" each generation. She asked us "What is the name by which we want this generation to be called?" It's an important question.

I take that down to a personal level - what is my legacy? What do I want to leave to Miss Baby and beyond? Where is my impact going to be? In all of these areas, I have to set levels appropriately for who I am, where I've been, and what I've already done. In addition, I have to ensure that I'm taking on the proper role in my family's life. I have concentrated, in the last year, on being wife and mother, and manager of the household. I've put my career on the back burner, and that's certainly forgivable. Now, I have to decide if this is what I want to continue - wife and mother before DevilMacDawg.

Some people say that "wife and mother" should be first and foremost. I don't feel that way. What I believe is that "wife and mother" are not as much roles that I play, but they are just part of being who I am. It's not something requiring focus, front and center. In that respect, I think I've been dishonest with myself about what I want - by putting the "wife and mother" role in front of all else, I've put too much pressure on myself to perform. I've made it hard. And it shouldn't be.

On the other hand, work has got to be important to me going forward. I'm moving into a time where I'm going to be the sole providor for my family. My husband may, if we're lucky, contribute something beginning in another year. However, even then, it won't be that much. So my career has to be important, from a financial standpoint.

In addition, however, my career is important to me. In working this shit job that I've had since 2001, I've allowed myself to be beaten down. I've begun to think "well, maybe I *should* stay at home with the kids." And that's just a lie - it's not me, and it's not what I want. It wouldn't be, very honestly, fair to my children.

Please note - this is not meant as a negative comment, in any way, to anyone who HAS made that decision. We each choose what is appropriate for our own circumstances. I'm saying it's not right for me. Taking it a step further, it's not right for me to expect that my career is going to play second fiddle to the rest of my life.

I am on the brink - I feel it. I'm about to break out of where I have been confined. I put it in front of myself that I will not be in this mauve and grey box much longer. I won't have to deal with the petty infighting that goes on here. I'm moving on to a place where people appreciate what I've accomplished and don't hold my background against me.

I know this is going to happen because I have prayed over it, and I continue doing so. I am being directed in this way by a higher power. I am also regaining my confidence and beginning to feel so much better about myself. And I know it will happen because I feel it in my bones as surely as I've ever felt anything. I've taken ownership over my life, for the first time in a while.

It's time, and it's the right thing. And it's the how I wish to be known.

You know what makes me mad?

When I so mad that I'm on the verge of tears, and I have to go see my boss about why I'm so mad, but I can't go cry to my boss about this problem because he doesn't know me well enough for me to cry to him.

I'm not ignoring questions in comments to posts below - more of a post on that when I have time.