The Divine Miss M

Miss M is my stepdaughter. I really can't sing her praises enough - I mean that in the positive sense. She's a wonderful, loving, caring, smart, funny, helpful, considerate, sweet, fabulous little girl. She's the greatest big sister to Miss Baby. Ever. Miss Baby loves her dearly.

So why this post? Well, if you've read this blog very much, then you know that Mr. Mac and I intend to move this summer. Away from here. Far, far away from here.

This move will be for the best in a lot of ways. It will get me out of a place which I hate and to which I'm allergic. It will get us all closer to our family. It will put Mr. Mac into a good position with regard to Law School (Mercer with money is a good place - and that's our worst-case scenario).

But it puts us MUCH farther away from Miss M.

Mr. Mac met with the ex last night to discuss the visitation changes. She's definitely done her homework, and she proposes that we take Miss M one weekend per month, at our choosing, during the school year. What this means is that we have Miss M with us for all the long breaks away from school, including Thanksgiving and Spring Break. We would also have her from Christmas Day to Jan. 2. Then we'd have her for "a long time" in the summer. Courts in our area generally give an out of state parent 85% of the summer, with monthly visitation during the school year. Therefore, I think it's safe to say we'd have her for 8 of her 10 weeks in the summer.

In sum, that means she's with us about 120 days per year. As it stands right now, that's about what we have - 125 days on the average. And we have that whole uninterrupted summer. And we have her for many days at a time - while we're generally not going to be working.

But we can't go pick her up at the drop of a hat when her mom gets called in to work. And we won't be here for Teacher Conferences. We'll have to take trips back to go to her plays and her recital.

Is this right for her? For us? Are we being awful people by going away?

Sigh. I don't know. I leave this decision in Mr. Mac's court. I'm too biased by wanting (needing!) to go home. What to do....